How Well Do You Know Your Partner?

In his workshops with married couples, John Gottman often suggests they complete this quiz, which takes the emotional temperature of a relationship. He calls it a “love map’’ because it helps you explore your partner’s inner world.

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I can name my partner’s best friends.
	Yes
	No

I know what stresses my partner is currently facing.
	Yes
	No

I know the names of some of the people who have been irritating my partner lately.
	Yes
	No

I can tell you some of my partner’s life dreams.
	Yes
	No

I can tell you about my partner’s basic philosophy of life.
	Yes
	No

I can list the relatives my partner likes the least.
	Yes
	No

I feel that my partner knows me pretty well.
	Yes
	No

When we are apart, I often think fondly of my partner.
	Yes
	No

I often touch or kiss my partner affectionately.
	Yes
	No

My partner really respects me.
	Yes
	No

There is fire and passion in this relationship.
	Yes
	No

Romance is definitely still part of our relationship.
	Yes
	No

My partner appreciates the things I do in this relationship.
	Yes
	No

My partner generally likes my personality.
	Yes
	No

Our sex life is mostly satisfying.
	Yes
	No

At the end of the day my partner is glad to see me.
	Yes
	No

My partner is one of my best friends.
	Yes
	No

We just love talking to each other.
	Yes
	No

There is lots of give and take (both people have influence) in our discussions.
	Yes
	No

My partner listens respectfully, even when we disagree.
	Yes
	No

My partner is usually a great help as a problem solver.
	Yes
	No

We generally mesh well on basic values and goals in life.
	Yes
	No